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	<title>The Dating Optimist &#187; being present</title>
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	<description>a little dose of love and life positivity</description>
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		<title>How to Live in the Moment</title>
		<link>http://thedatingoptimist.com/theblog/how-to-live-in-the-moment/</link>
		<comments>http://thedatingoptimist.com/theblog/how-to-live-in-the-moment/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 28 Aug 2009 07:52:02 +0000</pubDate>
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				<category><![CDATA[Being yourself]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[In the big wild world]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Optimisms]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[With a little help from your friends]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[being present]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relaxing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://thedatingoptimist.com/?p=445</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s so easy to talk about &#8220;living in the moment,&#8221; but not quite as easy to do. The other day, however, I forced myself to try, and it was such a rewarding experiment, I want to pass it on to you. I was with my husband, my sister and two of my friends, in a [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It&#8217;s so easy to talk about &#8220;living in the moment,&#8221; but not quite as easy to do. T<strong><span style="font-weight: normal;">he other day, however, I forced myself to try, and </span><span style="color: #a00d5c;">i</span><span style="color: #a00d5c;">t was such a rewarding experiment, I want to pass it on to you.</span></strong></p>
<div id="attachment_468" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-468" title="IMG_7398_2" src="http://thedatingoptimist.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/IMG_7398_21-300x239.jpg" alt="Me, I left my top on. (&quot;Vacation&quot; by Gusto)" width="300" height="239" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Me, I left my top on. (&quot;Vacation&quot; by Gusto)</p></div>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;">I was with my husband, my sister and two of my friends, in a fab house in the hills of L.A. As much as I love my own home, my backyard is covered in crabgrass, so lying on a lounge chair by a pool with a cold drink at my feet and nowhere special I needed to be makes for a good day. </span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;">Yet as happy as I was in the moment, I kept losing myself to thoughts that pulled me away from it: </span><em><span style="font-weight: normal;">I wonder if that email came through? What should we get for dinner? Ooh, and I have to remember to add that to my To Do list.</span></em><span style="font-weight: normal;"> Sure, my body was there, but my thoughts weren&#8217;t. And when I snapp<strong><span style="font-weight: normal;">ed to, I wondered: </span><span style="color: #a00d5c;">How much of the good stuff do we lose like this because our minds are somewhere else</span><span style="font-weight: normal;">, because they&#8217;ve moved on to future plans, to rushing around,to texting, to tweeting? This moment was too good, and I was determined to &#8220;live in the moment&#8221; the way we all say we should. So, I went sense by sense through what I was feeling from the base of my toes to the top of my head. I ask this of you, too: Put down the camera, turn off the phone and take a picture with your mind. </span></strong></span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;">Trust me, I&#8217;m not one to put down my iPhone easily; I&#8217;m addicted to the Trivial Pursuit App and I love me a good Twitterific visit. But I promise you: You <em>will</em> feel better sitting with silence for a few minutes and taking your life in. Here&#8217;s how:</span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><span style="color: #a00d5c;"><strong>Ask, &#8220;What do I feel?&#8221;</strong></span><span style="font-weight: normal;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-weight: normal;">Work your way up or down your body so you get it all. That day, for instance,  I felt my heels on the soft cushion. My back touching a pillow. My eyes and chest warmed by the sun. I also felt a perfectly soft breeze. And a bit of a scratch on my left thigh, which I attended to.</span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="color: #a00d5c;">Ask, &#8220;What do I hear?&#8221;</span><span style="font-weight: normal;"> Close your eyes if it helps to focus. I heard birds that day. A dog barking. The pool filter. My friend laughing from inside the kitchen. </span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="color: #a00d5c;">Ask, &#8220;What do I smell?&#8221;</span><span style="font-weight: normal;"> This one&#8217;s such an underrated sense, but is so closely tied to emotion and memory. Breathe deeply through your nose and see what you get. Me, I mostly smelled my suntan lotion. (You can make me wear sunscreen, but it still has to smell like coconuts frying on the beach!) </span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #a00d5c;"><strong>Ask, &#8220;What do I taste?&#8221; </strong><span style="color: #000000;">I tasted</span><strong> </strong></span>a mimosa. And some nacho chips stuck in my teeth. This could be improved upon.</span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #a00d5c;"><strong>Ask, &#8220;What do I see?&#8221;</strong></span> Take a shot with your mind of what&#8217;s ahead of you: the colors, the movement of things. I saw a blue pool, green hedges, my wet towel balled up on the ground that I wished I&#8217;d laid out to dry (dang it). Then look around you. What&#8217;s behind you that you hadn&#8217;t seen? <em>Who&#8217;s beside you who you could be appreciating? </em></span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;">I did this exercise a few years ago with my sister’s friends in the South of France, at a dinner on the sand when no one had a camera to capture the moment. Instead, we took turns talking about what we saw, heard, felt. And even now, the moonlight on the water and the lapping of those waves is more ingrained in my mind than the cute dog I snapped on my iPhone yesterday.</span></strong></p>
<div id="attachment_469" class="wp-caption aligncenter" style="width: 160px"><img class="size-thumbnail wp-image-469" title="IMG_0023_2" src="http://thedatingoptimist.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/IMG_0023_23-150x150.jpg" alt="Still, it is a cute dog, right?" width="150" height="150" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Still, it IS a cute dog, right?</p></div>
<p>We need to give ourselves the gifts of capturing these moments. Yes, Facebook updates and Twitpics (and, ahem, blogging) is all fun, and so is planning all the great stuff you&#8217;re inspired to do as soon as you finish reading this! But what about being present in <em>this</em> moment of life? Not through a lens, not through a filter, not as a stepping stone to tomorrow. Look at what your life is giving you today<strong>—<em><span style="font-weight: normal;">this hour</span></em><span style="font-weight: normal;">—to be happy about and grateful for. <span style="color: #a00d5c;"><strong>How can we really know what we want tomorrow if we don&#8217;t know how we feel about today? <span style="color: #000000;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Let&#8217;s</span></span></strong></span> give ourselves that gift more often than we do. The next time you find the present fleeting and life sort of passing you by, tune into your senses and take in the moment. You just may realize you love your life more than you knew you did.</span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;">Big love,</span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-weight: normal;"><img class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-449" title="Amy Signature 4" src="http://thedatingoptimist.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/Amy-Signature-413-150x80.jpg" alt="Amy Signature 4" width="150" height="80" /><br />
</span></strong></p>
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